Is there a reason I can’t stand still,
That’s when the anxiety hits real hard
I know it’s because I’m mentally ill,
For that you never receive a ‘Get well card’
My mind is always fast progressing,
My body frustrates when caught frozen,
While motionless my head is obsessing,
A brain headache that’s not been chosen
See the patterns on my wrist,
I don’t remember how they got there,
Suicide was very low on the list,
Jumps to the top with a wrongly took glare
A rushing brain causes dark stories
A calm mind sees what the eyes deny
Blurred and tainted all my past glories,
What you think creates the cursed lie
Torn between the two states,
Calm jumps to rock and hard place
Thinking flies off while the conscience waits,
So much confusion in so little space
Sometimes it’s hard to believe what you feel,
By now I can read the signs of an attack,
And the reason my mind can’t sit still,
Is the fear of it falling coarsely back.