Only you know me

I think I’m too afraid,
But I know,
If I don’t soon, I will fade,
Eventually, I will let go

Even If I fail, I will try
No more will I hide,
If I unsuccessfully die,
At least I have tried

Let me go if I’m cold,
Eyes shut never blinking,
I was never meant to grow old,
Dont question my thinking

And Dont blame the view
I just like the sea
And I dont blame you,
It’s all on me

Tormented

What do you do
With a blanket of needs
Dying in front of you,
When communication has stopped,
The mind has collapsed,
And the addict scars
Grow from the inside
Swallowing the entire family whole,
Silence is worry
Conversation is pain
Though we carry on
And proceed with the fairytale,
Because if there’s breath
There’s a chance,
Or so we kid ourselves to think,
The truth is the edge becomes closer
With every anxious blink,
Each second the heart fails
Adds to the deathly nails,
And Laying calmly in wait
The coffin of addiction,

The final chapter enters insanity,
Awoken voices
Guides the mind
Onto the path of enlightenment,
Passing destruction and horror
Along the way,
The soul reaches the door of salvation
Save yourself, save all,
Close your eyes and walk towards,
One last chance of redemption
Make peace and fly,
Lay back and Wash away the guilt
Slowly as you die,
This ending offers no twist
No saviour to speak of,
Only a paragraph of truth
And reality
Which helps love ones to share,
That finially pulls the curtain
On this story called despair.

A Touch of Remorse

It was dark
And I was alone,
Think and repent they said,
Who do they think they are
Demanding,
A trait devoid of understanding.
Have they ever been shut away
Like this before
with no Windows?
I thought not.
I haven’t until now,
I’ve known people who have,
And how.
Anyway I found nothing,
Inside myself, nothing.
Only a thought
And a question.
Why does persecution
Fall on the wrong people?
The thought was about my mum.
See I’m no harm to anyone.
Tell the truth or live
It doesn’t matter
I’m lost you see,
Shut the door
Throw away the key.

Amputated

A finger cut loose
Separated from the Dominant hand
Leaving others broken and fractured,
A poorly sight of Deformed appendages left limp and tragic,
Is this fate?
Trying to manipulate my train of thinking
A threat carried out
To stop the written hand
Producing my verses of alternatives
Converting black into grey,
Am I Getting to close
To warrant a mystical warning,
A pointed finger cursing mine
Forcing me to throw down tools
Over The edge of damnation,
What next my eyes, My mind,
Should I stop banging my words
Into an order of verse
That wakes the sleeping baby of chaos.

No these thoughts exist Because we exist,
I will take my Sacrifice
And keep bringing forth
The fantasy of my world
Blending thinly into theirs,
By believing is creating,
Giving thoughts a substance
To make nightmares whole,
The warning I will heed
But it proves that I would bleed
To thrive in the unknown,
Unlock doors to interpretations
And bring some kind of order
To the underlying turmoil.

Destructible

I have no words
I am an empty Figure
Dried up and weathered,
Discarded and thrown aside,
By my own mind
And compulsions.
Blood is my ink,
And Ink survives in the youth,
The fountain still produced
Though the source runs dry,
Just dust and bone
Laying in the worn paths
Where creativity and life
Flows no more.

Lost

To create an illusion
You have to want to believe
In the story of fabrication,
Feel the emotional pull
Of the alternate reality
To keep your feet on hollow ground.

A legacy is made
Born of life and imagination,
A Kingdom created
By a mind so wonderful
And woeful,
No balance could be made.

Here we shall live forever,
In this sometime reality,
Until thy shadow is cast
Along the red sky,

Then we shall know
The horizon of truth And time,
Is calling the soul to fly,
To walk towards the light,
To Dive into the sea,
And whisper goodbye.

Broken

Broken

If you notice how I feel
Please don’t go ahead and ask
As my tears will start to surface
And wash away my mask

You stare in to my eyes
To notice I’m not blinking
Please keep my aching secret
That inside my heart is sinking

I will just get through this moment
Squeeze my hand, but keep my lie
My strength will suppress my tears
Only alone will I break and cry.

Is This The Real Life.

Seclusion disturbs the stages,
The erratic plates of the mind,
Causing Eruptions of static rages
Shouting off, blinkered and blind,

Craters form at the bottom of the sea
Bottomless holes, cold and deep,
Lying mystic as a human subconscious,
Under a rock, where secrets seep

Only Sudden Trauma unlocks it secrets,
Forever Untouched, hidden and unseen,
Once opened be prepared for preservation,
For trauma reveals itself, only In screams

Exposure plays tricks with stories of the dead,
Condemning the closest people at heart,
Ripping family memories to distorted shreds,
And splits a once calm sanity apart.

The equator to madness Is very fine,
Leading uncertainty on a turbulent dance,
Stretching facts to fit the signs,
That chaos is coming, given the chance.

Nightmares are worse, when hells awoken,
Reacting evil, to noise and to light,
People pray such words are never spoken,
And that eyes stay shut, for a restful still night.

Lies become real, in blackness of dreams,
People of reality will watch and weep,
As their love one, trembles, stirs, and screams,
From the illusion its facing, inside their dark sleep.

Lay Me Down

A silent hymn swarms the senses
Sensations charged, bloods too swift
Memory poisoned, weary of pretences
With each sharp point a full body lift.

Awake fever cold, lips texture of slate
Rejects visual help, deny the sound
Bruises new, a pure circular shape
Flakiness of skin, ankles once bound

Real or a film of fiction
Inspect body, stifle a scream
Escape attempts creates harm friction
Lesions made, stain skin at the seam.

Dream of scenarios, body cuffed tight
Butterfly effect, wings have swung
A nightmare which overlaps the night
Sour taste to mouth, intrusion in lung

Cloaked a stranger, calls a name
Intimate outlines with empty stares
Swear words alluded through shame
Convulsing body pulls skin to tear.

Melt through sheets as sweat gives way
Escape plan hatched, float through floors
Arms stretched out to slink away
Reality bites down, home to four walls

Travel shift to outside ward
Undeniably a dream to recognise
A body concealed from open doors
Head slips to reveal the disguise.

Alive in bed or dead where I stand
A premonition gift, given to hear
Trust not to cry off a helping hand
An awakening lust, the minds clear

Fear defends the external choice
Bittersweet to white flag this race
For now someone else speaks my voice
Though the ceiling still reflects my face.

Chest tight by weight of heaving
Already howled the meltdown song
Truth hits quiet, no prizes for leaving
To dampen my mind, this is where I belong.

Simply Be

You only die of confusion if you haven’t accepted its certainty,
Like a Time ticking bomb,
A Weapon of emotional destruction,
In time you cant avoid,

A Shoulder can drop to faint
The weight of gain,
But burden still reigns,
Until the pains
Remind you, you’re still alive

Walking around a church
Searching for space
To lay in peace
Or kneel to pray,
Either way
Morbid fascination
Gives in to factual nature.

Nothing to prove
Or lose,
Just leap to your faith, and fate,
Smiling all the way,
So not to reap too early,
Before your final date.