Amputated

A finger cut loose
Separated from the Dominant hand
Leaving others broken and fractured,
A poorly sight of Deformed appendages left limp and tragic,
Is this fate?
Trying to manipulate my train of thinking
A threat carried out
To stop the written hand
Producing my verses of alternatives
Converting black into grey,
Am I Getting to close
To warrant a mystical warning,
A pointed finger cursing mine
Forcing me to throw down tools
Over The edge of damnation,
What next my eyes, My mind,
Should I stop banging my words
Into an order of verse
That wakes the sleeping baby of chaos.

No these thoughts exist Because we exist,
I will take my Sacrifice
And keep bringing forth
The fantasy of my world
Blending thinly into theirs,
By believing is creating,
Giving thoughts a substance
To make nightmares whole,
The warning I will heed
But it proves that I would bleed
To thrive in the unknown,
Unlock doors to interpretations
And bring some kind of order
To the underlying turmoil.

Destructible

I have no words
I am an empty Figure
Dried up and weathered,
Discarded and thrown aside,
By my own mind
And compulsions.
Blood is my ink,
And Ink survives in the youth,
The fountain still produced
Though the source runs dry,
Just dust and bone
Laying in the worn paths
Where creativity and life
Flows no more.

Lost

To create an illusion
You have to want to believe
In the story of fabrication,
Feel the emotional pull
Of the alternate reality
To keep your feet on hollow ground.

A legacy is made
Born of life and imagination,
A Kingdom created
By a mind so wonderful
And woeful,
No balance could be made.

Here we shall live forever,
In this sometime reality,
Until thy shadow is cast
Along the red sky,

Then we shall know
The horizon of truth And time,
Is calling the soul to fly,
To walk towards the light,
To Dive into the sea,
And whisper goodbye.

Broken

Broken

If you notice how I feel
Please don’t go ahead and ask
As my tears will start to surface
And wash away my mask

You stare in to my eyes
To notice I’m not blinking
Please keep my aching secret
That inside my heart is sinking

I will just get through this moment
Squeeze my hand, but keep my lie
My strength will suppress my tears
Only alone will I break and cry.

Is This The Real Life.

Seclusion disturbs the stages,
The erratic plates of the mind,
Causing Eruptions of static rages
Shouting off, blinkered and blind,

Craters form at the bottom of the sea
Bottomless holes, cold and deep,
Lying mystic as a human subconscious,
Under a rock, where secrets seep

Only Sudden Trauma unlocks it secrets,
Forever Untouched, hidden and unseen,
Once opened be prepared for preservation,
For trauma reveals itself, only In screams

Exposure plays tricks with stories of the dead,
Condemning the closest people at heart,
Ripping family memories to distorted shreds,
And splits a once calm sanity apart.

The equator to madness Is very fine,
Leading uncertainty on a turbulent dance,
Stretching facts to fit the signs,
That chaos is coming, given the chance.

Nightmares are worse, when hells awoken,
Reacting evil, to noise and to light,
People pray such words are never spoken,
And that eyes stay shut, for a restful still night.

Lies become real, in blackness of dreams,
People of reality will watch and weep,
As their love one, trembles, stirs, and screams,
From the illusion its facing, inside their dark sleep.

Lay Me Down

A silent hymn swarms the senses
Sensations charged, bloods too swift
Memory poisoned, weary of pretences
With each sharp point a full body lift.

Awake fever cold, lips texture of slate
Rejects visual help, deny the sound
Bruises new, a pure circular shape
Flakiness of skin, ankles once bound

Real or a film of fiction
Inspect body, stifle a scream
Escape attempts creates harm friction
Lesions made, stain skin at the seam.

Dream of scenarios, body cuffed tight
Butterfly effect, wings have swung
A nightmare which overlaps the night
Sour taste to mouth, intrusion in lung

Cloaked a stranger, calls a name
Intimate outlines with empty stares
Swear words alluded through shame
Convulsing body pulls skin to tear.

Melt through sheets as sweat gives way
Escape plan hatched, float through floors
Arms stretched out to slink away
Reality bites down, home to four walls

Travel shift to outside ward
Undeniably a dream to recognise
A body concealed from open doors
Head slips to reveal the disguise.

Alive in bed or dead where I stand
A premonition gift, given to hear
Trust not to cry off a helping hand
An awakening lust, the minds clear

Fear defends the external choice
Bittersweet to white flag this race
For now someone else speaks my voice
Though the ceiling still reflects my face.

Chest tight by weight of heaving
Already howled the meltdown song
Truth hits quiet, no prizes for leaving
To dampen my mind, this is where I belong.

Simply Be

You only die of confusion if you haven’t accepted its certainty,
Like a Time ticking bomb,
A Weapon of emotional destruction,
In time you cant avoid,

A Shoulder can drop to faint
The weight of gain,
But burden still reigns,
Until the pains
Remind you, you’re still alive

Walking around a church
Searching for space
To lay in peace
Or kneel to pray,
Either way
Morbid fascination
Gives in to factual nature.

Nothing to prove
Or lose,
Just leap to your faith, and fate,
Smiling all the way,
So not to reap too early,
Before your final date.

Changes

The mind is adept at its own pretence
When a foreseeable ending claws at its sense
Rapid spate of change is hard to allow
Crystal clear thoughts deviate from the brow
An uncontrolled destined moment in time
Perspectives of honesty bring up the divine
Amnesiac spaces previous and after
Brings the transition not nearer nor faster

Change sparks defence to raise fully clad
Denial, like a sane man humouring the mad
A rapid such ending wretches the soul
Pulls what we possess to never let go
Our sleepless gut instinct repulses the last
Repelling an echo of struggles near past
For even the efficient an ending feels strange
A limbo state not desiring to change

An unconscious unknown steadily beckons
Lifetime of intake, although its just seconds
Confusion is ripe though doesn’t persist
Without endings your presence wouldn’t exist
On ponder a moment which presents a choice
An alternate view to retain a lost voice
Reflect to proceed, an perceptive mind wins
Determine an ending, is where a new first begins.

All Stand

We are all living
We are all dying
Ask for forgiving
When the soul is flying

We can all speak
We can all be silent
Tested at our peak
When the world is violent

We can all act
We are all still
We choose to react
To help at will

We can all love
We can all hate
Cleanse the fisted glove
Before it’s too late

We can all kiss
We can all shout
Think of the effect
When we open our mouth

We can all laugh
We can all cry
Leave no wrath
When you die

We can choose wrong
We can choose right
No one belongs
In a sense of fright

We can all be kind
We can all be mean
We can all be blind
To the horrors we see

We can all be quiet
We all have a voice
We all have a chance
To make the right choice

Stigma Video

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#achoicetovoice I've uploaded a short video of myself talking about my ill mental health and what I,ve suffered with. I feel it helps take off some of the weight, and release some pressure. I don't worry what people think anymore, but I know others do and this a massive thing people have to deal with – the thought of being judged. I'm trying to encourage people to upload their videos of what they suffer with and talk briefly about issues that maybe they been too nervous or afraid to say to others. I should say only do this if you feel in safe place mentally to do so. In the comfort of your own company tell the world a little of yourself and your experience. It may help others, and give a little shift in ending the stigma. It may also give people a bit more understanding of how you see life. A glimpse behind your eyes. Once you say it out loud, it gives it substance,makes it real, and then possibly easier to deal with. A chance to be open and honest and share a bit of yourself in 60 seconds. Use any language as emotions are universal. Once again only upload if you feel safe. So please if you feel safe and well to do please share your video. There are millions of people who struggle world wide with ill mental health. Together we can share our stories and prove we're not alone, even if it feels that way. Use the hashtag – #achoicetovoice #anxiety #depression #bipolar #videos #suicide #stigma #music #film #poetryencryptionmind #writers #mentalhealthawareness #nerves #socialanxiety #isolation #crying #celebrity #ocd #addict #obsessive #compulsive #obsession #syndrome #talk

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Use the hashtag #achoicetovoice