Numb Num3ers

6 was the magic number
Or was it 3 and 12?
Always stuck to evens 4,8,16
But odds I sometimes delved
13, 23 filled me with dread
10’s good but 5 is great
Why not Friday 14th instead?
3’s nicely rounded, so is 8

666 is evil, but it’s an even number
Confused what I’m doing this 4
Bakers dozen shouldn’t be allowed
999 no help at all
A multiple gift that comes for 3?
20, 25, multiply and subtract
6 and 9 are upside down,
Leap year not sure how to react

60 mins, 60 seconds, why not 100?
19:24 is a digital clock pain
5 gold rings and checking things
13’s unlucky and 7’s fulls of vain
4, 8, 12, straight flush
The perfect number, where’s it 2?
School maths, a 45 degree nightmare
3 × 3 trigonometry, had to see it through

Why 3 pigs and 3 bears?
7 years bad luck or magnificent?
1 never seems ever enough
And what’s after 100 percent?
Adapt, arrange, ÷ on repeat
3, 6, no improvement with evolution
With OCD no matter the equation,
The answer is never the end solution.

Stigma Video

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#achoicetovoice I've uploaded a short video of myself talking about my ill mental health and what I,ve suffered with. I feel it helps take off some of the weight, and release some pressure. I don't worry what people think anymore, but I know others do and this a massive thing people have to deal with – the thought of being judged. I'm trying to encourage people to upload their videos of what they suffer with and talk briefly about issues that maybe they been too nervous or afraid to say to others. I should say only do this if you feel in safe place mentally to do so. In the comfort of your own company tell the world a little of yourself and your experience. It may help others, and give a little shift in ending the stigma. It may also give people a bit more understanding of how you see life. A glimpse behind your eyes. Once you say it out loud, it gives it substance,makes it real, and then possibly easier to deal with. A chance to be open and honest and share a bit of yourself in 60 seconds. Use any language as emotions are universal. Once again only upload if you feel safe. So please if you feel safe and well to do please share your video. There are millions of people who struggle world wide with ill mental health. Together we can share our stories and prove we're not alone, even if it feels that way. Use the hashtag – #achoicetovoice #anxiety #depression #bipolar #videos #suicide #stigma #music #film #poetryencryptionmind #writers #mentalhealthawareness #nerves #socialanxiety #isolation #crying #celebrity #ocd #addict #obsessive #compulsive #obsession #syndrome #talk

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Use the hashtag #achoicetovoice

Unofficial Friends

Now the pain has decreased from my heart
The force from others is strong and stalks
Hard to be neighbouring for fear of being pulled under
Once my empathy laid low, now it gladly talks
Fight or flight, flight is to flee from the crowd
Their emotions burn and frustrate the internal light
A forced hand gives a gift to help people
Silent voices have grown noisy and bright

Ignorance is for the weak, empathy for the strong
Quieten own torment gives hope to clamp down others
Whispers are shouts heard through loud mediums
Their parents children, rejected by society mothers
Listening is vital, accepted is desired
Once heard entitled to breakdown and cry
An acoustic ear has never been so powerful
Emotions congruent, a glare picks up a lie

Nerves affecting both sides, each brave and alone
Strangers are closer through speech and a mutual stare
Powerful bond that stems from separate trauma
A weaponless ally that shifts on opposite chair
A commitment made, a relationship formed
Built on emotion, pain and the spoken word
One listens, hears, holds its partners past
Each human equal, just wanted to be heard

Distracted and advasive but time needs time
In the beginning we are all free falling
Resistance and confusion veers from chosen path
Reminded and affirmed this is their internal calling

A damaged voice may carry many passengers
A story with many long psychological wars
Dual heads held high by a relational depth
This the first step in a trip of emotional tours.

Treading Water

Choose to climb
and escape the stone walls
that close in
like a dampening breath to the neck,
The goosebumps are real
coldness can’t be faked
neither can the dread which creeps from below,
Move or perish
from the hesitant pause
that captures indecisive minds
freezing the will to submission.
So climb,
Or leave it to fate,
Let go and fall in to emptiness
become weightless in body and mind,
Float down star shaped
with eyes unable to close
as you look upward bidding farewell
to life,
part of the punishment of surrendering to hell,
Light dissolves in seconds
free falling in to darkness
to an eternal expanse.
Deviant whispers from nowhere
keep you from sleep
and peace,
A choice to make,
Fall and drown forever as a prisoner
or climb and fight.

Forsaken

Wipe the moisture from words spoken
Then was a different time.
A shallow belief in the healing power
Years bring.
Not only appearances change
Internal aspects develop
Maturing to produce surprising acts.

I wish we would meet once more
My personality now encouraged to spread.
Stood from where it hid
Shadowed and intimidated
By beauty and popularity.

I was neither in my own eyes
Abuse proved the ideals of my self worth
Mirrored and lived
Through the script of thoughts.

Still my reflection is disgruntled
Shattered pieces of soul
Lay floored
Depicting memories of scattered remains.

Turned

Love is an echo
a wind that seeks a home
extinguishing candles of dejection
lit by praying souls,
Possessing my willing heart
with a harmonious breeze
I need not want for more emotion
as it brings me to my knees,
Shriek out to the world
as love flows through my veins
I’ve never see the sun before
I’ve only lived through rains