Fallen

When sat alone
With the weight of blood
Panicked in solitude
Restricted from external wounds
Do we cry,
Or lie down upon the sympathy?
Voicing the same tale
To heighten ears
Imagining on empathic fears
Which soon dies
From curious eyes.
The scars of eternity sparks interest
To unknown generations
Seeking if the whispers are truth.
They are, if not worse,
Bones were cracked
Shock crushed the breath,
The story revealed forever wrapped in light
Never disclosing
How close we were to death.

Amputated

A finger cut loose
Separated from the Dominant hand
Leaving others broken and fractured,
A poorly sight of Deformed appendages left limp and tragic,
Is this fate?
Trying to manipulate my train of thinking
A threat carried out
To stop the written hand
Producing my verses of alternatives
Converting black into grey,
Am I Getting to close
To warrant a mystical warning,
A pointed finger cursing mine
Forcing me to throw down tools
Over The edge of damnation,
What next my eyes, My mind,
Should I stop banging my words
Into an order of verse
That wakes the sleeping baby of chaos.

No these thoughts exist Because we exist,
I will take my Sacrifice
And keep bringing forth
The fantasy of my world
Blending thinly into theirs,
By believing is creating,
Giving thoughts a substance
To make nightmares whole,
The warning I will heed
But it proves that I would bleed
To thrive in the unknown,
Unlock doors to interpretations
And bring some kind of order
To the underlying turmoil.

Destructible

I have no words
I am an empty Figure
Dried up and weathered,
Discarded and thrown aside,
By my own mind
And compulsions.
Blood is my ink,
And Ink survives in the youth,
The fountain still produced
Though the source runs dry,
Just dust and bone
Laying in the worn paths
Where creativity and life
Flows no more.

The Show Must Go On

The Show Must Go On

He will try to convince you
To do the merry dance,
The joker,
Pretending to be your friend,
His Manic laughter
Promising happily ever after.
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jesters hat,
Go away you insidious monster
You mock yourself with that,
One, two, the fools on you
I see your game
Suffocating my lungs
Crushing my heart,
Whispering my name.
Bloody depression…

Lost

To create an illusion
You have to want to believe
In the story of fabrication,
Feel the emotional pull
Of the alternate reality
To keep your feet on hollow ground.

A legacy is made
Born of life and imagination,
A Kingdom created
By a mind so wonderful
And woeful,
No balance could be made.

Here we shall live forever,
In this sometime reality,
Until thy shadow is cast
Along the red sky,

Then we shall know
The horizon of truth And time,
Is calling the soul to fly,
To walk towards the light,
To Dive into the sea,
And whisper goodbye.

Broken

Broken

If you notice how I feel
Please don’t go ahead and ask
As my tears will start to surface
And wash away my mask

You stare in to my eyes
To notice I’m not blinking
Please keep my aching secret
That inside my heart is sinking

I will just get through this moment
Squeeze my hand, but keep my lie
My strength will suppress my tears
Only alone will I break and cry.

Am I now or have I ever been…

Am I now or have I ever been?

Externally and physically
Inviting to the opposite sex,
Internally and emotionally
Distant and frigid to love,
Forever lost,
Doubting my place, my goodness
And my worth to another.

Pushing away sweetness and warmth,
Ignore a face of beauty,
An opportunity to share life
By treating closeness as a threat,
Consciously self harming the connection,
Tearing apart romance and trust,
Feeling guilty and broken inside,
But long term, I felt, I must.

No love left
I was bereft,
So many good people lost
To a mind of no confidence,
A charm with no substance,
And a heart that self destructs
When touched

Am I now,
Or have I ever been
Worthy of a free conscious,
To be finially empty of self pity and sabotage,
Why did I always condemn my soul
To isolation?

I will not know the answer
For I no more question my place,
By choice I add truthfully, not by avoidance,
I now live in some kind of elation
When a precious connection presents itself
As a friend.

Those who befriended me in my youth,
And even at present
I salute you,
Conversation never comes easy,
Though fleeing does,
For us to both stand our grounds
And endure for friendship
Is a lifeline to some,
And a miracle of development,
In character and personality,
For a sufferer of worry and displacement
Like me.

Half Empty

As deep as I am
My heart is shallow,
Like a dried up well
Where springs once fell
And now lies fallow.

Blood circles cold
Round my body of existence,
But once insecurity is fed
It stains where I bled
Drowning self resistance.

My mind fills with fog
Offering aspects of confusion,
But one thing that’s clear
I’m forever here
Is this life of illusion.

Bravery lays redundant
And as honest as I speak
The soul will shake
Then the voices will awake,
Confounding I’m weak.

Raining in Paradise

Tormented by the taste
Of the fermented drink.
A self inflicted punishment
That leads to perdition.

Individuals hear the calls of the delusional,
Screaming or shouting in confusion
Scratching at the walls
Fighting to flee a false enemy.

When will it resolve
The feelings of guilt or solitude.
Surely, solution lies with quick ends
Other then slow diminishing pain,
Breathless days,
And a Swinging of moods.

Deathly dropping into permanent sleep
The only salvation,
Dreaming of wondrous times
Becomes bringer of peace,
To the chaos mind affected.

Blood no longer matters
Alcohol has polluted the viens,
The same person that once was,
No longer exists,
Now the poison,
Has reached the dark side of the brain.

Taken

Long live the memories, the lessons
And the scars.
The fun has surpassed, living life and fast cars.
Bring out the coffin, the bringer of mystery
Wrapped in riches of new, brimming of history
Horns will blare and even grown men shall weep
As the parade glides by to telegraph this sleep.
For this day only, not one thing is the same
Each conversation begins with the mention of their name
The eyes were alight, but now they stand cold
Voyaged in a Carriage, with wheels made of gold.
Dry the tissues, wipe away velvet tears
Substitute frowns with smiles and silent cheers
Memories flood, and emotions will sway
Leave the sadness where you stand, on this lone surreal day.