Aftermath

Addiction seems so fruitful
Mountains of highs
Valleys of lows
We fight to-and-fro
Reaching for the sky to smile
But always end up drowning
Down below in the depths.

The aftermath of addiction
Drags down the soul
Swamps joy and hope
To the point of destruction,
Sleep becomes a distant distraction,
Sweat is the choice of panic
And crying the release for help.

The hole is deep
Dug by individual hand
Which carries the burden solely
The weight of the dirt,
Mountains are far out of sight
Especially as sinking begins
And normality shrinks.
Was peaking high
Worth the aftermath
And the massacre of feelings
That follows like a shadow
For eternity.

Burn

We have to unlearn
To be a Burden,
Release the frustrated
Of feeling hated.
We try and we try
To live and not die,
But it’s so hard
To kick start
The energy and will
To swallow the pill
To be able to see straight
And let go of the hate.

I look in the reflection
And see no direction,
Just roads of chaos
Leading to being lost.
I know, and I feel
One day I will heal
Until then I shall not hide
And Choose to stay inside
Where comfort lies in place
And I never show my face.

I will go forth to live
Allow myself to forgive
All the invisible thoughts
That cut my life short,
Yes I shall stand
Drop the knife from hand
Pull up out of the bath
Smile and laugh,
You know I could
In fact I know I should,
If only I wasnt dead
And the water wasnt red,
And my thoughts wasnt fate
Telling me im too late,
I never learn
Im still a burden
My family will find me
Open the door and see
My body, or what’s left,
See I’m still out of place, even in death.

Free

We bleed because we need too. Release our thoughts, tensions and anxieties to the world, to resolve and find some balance.
Whose knows the answer to an unhappy species, which inhales the toxic spouting of leaders through open straws of lies.
Virus spreads but manipulation and greed stand immortal and immune to human suffering. In fact it thrives to the extent of watching the vermin argue amongst themselves, defending honours of deviants and dammed.
I find peace in knowing deep inside that my conscience is clear, my mind is open, and silence is an option to stupidity.

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Antidote

Run run run away
The thread is wearing thin
Escape escape escape this place
No one knows where you’ve been

Flee flee flee this cave
Don’t know what you might find
Help help help yourself
Take possession of your mind

Change change change direction
Squeeze the blood out From your hand
Free free free the poison
Maybe now you’ll understand

Amputated

A finger cut loose
Separated from the Dominant hand
Leaving others broken and fractured,
A poorly sight of Deformed appendages left limp and tragic,
Is this fate?
Trying to manipulate my train of thinking
A threat carried out
To stop the written hand
Producing my verses of alternatives
Converting black into grey,
Am I Getting to close
To warrant a mystical warning,
A pointed finger cursing mine
Forcing me to throw down tools
Over The edge of damnation,
What next my eyes, My mind,
Should I stop banging my words
Into an order of verse
That wakes the sleeping baby of chaos.

No these thoughts exist Because we exist,
I will take my Sacrifice
And keep bringing forth
The fantasy of my world
Blending thinly into theirs,
By believing is creating,
Giving thoughts a substance
To make nightmares whole,
The warning I will heed
But it proves that I would bleed
To thrive in the unknown,
Unlock doors to interpretations
And bring some kind of order
To the underlying turmoil.

Half Empty

As deep as I am
My heart is shallow,
Like a dried up well
Where springs once fell
And now lies fallow.

Blood circles cold
Round my body of existence,
But once insecurity is fed
It stains where I bled
Drowning self resistance.

My mind fills with fog
Offering aspects of confusion,
But one thing that’s clear
I’m forever here
Is this life of illusion.

Bravery lays redundant
And as honest as I speak
The soul will shake
Then the voices will awake,
Confounding I’m weak.

Taken

Long live the memories, the lessons
And the scars.
The fun has surpassed, living life and fast cars.
Bring out the coffin, the bringer of mystery
Wrapped in riches of new, brimming of history
Horns will blare and even grown men shall weep
As the parade glides by to telegraph this sleep.
For this day only, not one thing is the same
Each conversation begins with the mention of their name
The eyes were alight, but now they stand cold
Voyaged in a Carriage, with wheels made of gold.
Dry the tissues, wipe away velvet tears
Substitute frowns with smiles and silent cheers
Memories flood, and emotions will sway
Leave the sadness where you stand, on this lone surreal day.

Lay Me Down

A silent hymn swarms the senses
Sensations charged, bloods too swift
Memory poisoned, weary of pretences
With each sharp point a full body lift.

Awake fever cold, lips texture of slate
Rejects visual help, deny the sound
Bruises new, a pure circular shape
Flakiness of skin, ankles once bound

Real or a film of fiction
Inspect body, stifle a scream
Escape attempts creates harm friction
Lesions made, stain skin at the seam.

Dream of scenarios, body cuffed tight
Butterfly effect, wings have swung
A nightmare which overlaps the night
Sour taste to mouth, intrusion in lung

Cloaked a stranger, calls a name
Intimate outlines with empty stares
Swear words alluded through shame
Convulsing body pulls skin to tear.

Melt through sheets as sweat gives way
Escape plan hatched, float through floors
Arms stretched out to slink away
Reality bites down, home to four walls

Travel shift to outside ward
Undeniably a dream to recognise
A body concealed from open doors
Head slips to reveal the disguise.

Alive in bed or dead where I stand
A premonition gift, given to hear
Trust not to cry off a helping hand
An awakening lust, the minds clear

Fear defends the external choice
Bittersweet to white flag this race
For now someone else speaks my voice
Though the ceiling still reflects my face.

Chest tight by weight of heaving
Already howled the meltdown song
Truth hits quiet, no prizes for leaving
To dampen my mind, this is where I belong.