Laughing in the success of failure
Somehow I knew you hated me
Judged by external blemishes
And short minded deviants
Who only see, what they want to see
Believe the fragile foundations
Where truth sits balanced
Where a lie weighs down the world
Collapsing the final ounce of confidence
Society now accepts
Colourful to admire
Quiet as strange Loud as a superstar
Normal as estranged
No wonder personalities dance for eternity, Without falling into place
As the selfish run the asylum Not allowing room for a diverse face
Our bones are the substance
The soul radiates lifes powers
Whatever age we’re taken
We will all lye down with flowers.
My history is no mystery. It’s shines in the background, as do I.
My life is an open book, if you ask I shall tell you the truth of my afflictions.
OCD, agoraphobia, depression, all haunted my soul for so long. Making me feel guilt and pain for no reason. Polluting my thoughts with never-ending negative whirlwinds.
Sometimes it was hard to think of what to believe. The truth inside me, or the inner voice spouting falsehoods and creating a dark landscape for me to follow.
I learned to diminish these happenings, put aside the demon to the sides of me.
Only then could I breathe clean air, think clear thoughts and live a truth, not a lie.
My character has, and always will remain intact. My soul has been tainted by ill mental health, but my fight and vision lies true.
Free hand to write
On the edge of polite
To the mind and soul
Moods high or low
Circling the pain
That keeps me sane
Will I today survive
Hurt says I’m alive
Praying to the God enveloped my head
Why own thoughts are wishing me dead
Confined to the 4 corners of my room
Take me now, or take me soon
Heavy head with knees a bleeding
Nodding still, crouching and pleading
Babbling a language all of my own
Can’t find solitude, until I’m home
Various flashbacks of whom im calling
Above my eyes raising and falling
Swallowing my soul, my light to see
Who am I?, who will save me?
Answer now or forever stay silent
So I can walk peacefully
Into the twilight
Every decision feels like a life threatening choice. The mind choosing an option, changing it’s mind, then changing it back again.
Every day decisions, like where to go out, or what to eat. The doubts of an anxious mind put different scenarios in your head, making it a tormenting life.
Always questioning whether you’ve made the right choice. It’s a hard way to live. A lonely place of guilt and living on nerves.
That’s how anxiety and depression fights happiness. Putting doubt and fear in safe situations.
It’s the most disabling crush on ones sanity…
Crave to be remembered, etched in history
In my words, I’ll always leave some mystery
Speaking though my head feels dismembered
Lost or found is how I’ll be remembered
The blind sees many depressed rhymes
Enlightened, will read between the lines
View behind the eyes to see deep
Hidden meaning’s that made me weep
Words just scratch against the surface
Casual thoughts produced as a circus
Poetry Masks a majority of emotional acts
In the truer words, I’m never holding back
Take own life while personality in song?
Leave this realm incase the mind functions wrong
Intrusive forces weighing the mind to sink
Desperately searching for some missing link
Invisible in body and the voice is weak
Waiting patiently for the peace I seek
Invade my story see what you find
Interpret the words I’ll one day leave behind.
I suppose it’s because I felt on a roll,
Where I start to question whose in control
Always going to happen, writing this out,
That sooner or later, I’d be struck by doubt
Is it My imagination writing all this,
Or Anxiety, my old friend and nemesis
Hello my old foe looking over my shoulder,
You haven’t changed a bit, but i look a lot older
I should of known that working hard graft,
It would creep up on me, like a freezing cold draught
Don’t need you right now, though thanks for the attack,
Just leave, because if I let you, you’d be right back
I have to be watchful, it can be quite clever
Do I need its help? the true answer, never
Usually I’m not in the mood to mess with
But I’ve had enough of its passive aggressive
Still it’s been awhile, and it hasn’t kept on
I look freely around, and by truth it’s gone
I smile, because I’ve got rid of the troll
For now I guess, that means im in control.
Rainbows speak of reincarnated souls
Revisiting their loves ones
One last time,
Using colours to spark smiles
Memories, and a warmth to the soul.
No other wonder can eclipse the serinity
Or the view that challenges belief,
A miracle spectrum and an insight of heaven
Produced in a wave of inspiration
As a gift for all to see.
When the mind is lost to the dark
And the colour fades from life
Stride out of the storm
And search for that Rainbow